Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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