Do you still have your period?
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
