At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
