Say something about gay babies.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
