Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(609): View more from New Jersey

Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow

(802): View more from Vermont

Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow

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(239): View more from Florida

At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt

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(702): View more from Nevada

Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...

(918): View more from Oklahoma

Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...

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(760): View more from California

He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄

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