they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I see more hoeing in ur future
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