i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize