Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
