Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
