I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
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