you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
