I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
