he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
Randomize
