Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Randomize