Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
