have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
