No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize