This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
