Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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