Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
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