So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
