The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
