Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I've blown a few things in my day
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize