I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
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