They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
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