Rock
Scissors
Fuck
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
