Apparently you make a good broom.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
