your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Randomize