Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
