We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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