I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize
