She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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