capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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