Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
