I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
