Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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