This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize
