what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I just want nice things and good sex
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Randomize