i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
