Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
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