im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
