I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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