so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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