I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
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