I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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