Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize