The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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