He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
