Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
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