It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
